In light of the fact that my next post will be a doozy, I'll keep this short and sweet.
I've been tagged by Lauren and Laurel Wreath for a couple of book memes, and I'll get to those as soon as I can. Thank you ladies for thinking of me!
I learned from my little girlfriend Kayla's dad today that she's been in the hospital for a week(!) recovering from a car accident. Kayla is my daughter's soccer teammate from last year. She's doing well and expected to go home with her dad tomorrow, but she is lucky to be alive (the car flipped and hit a tree.) I've mentioned her before at the end of this post. Her dad is optimistic that they can work things out, and I'm so thankful for God's intervention. He is good. All the time.
I found an interesting post here , and I'd like to hear your thoughts. Agree or disagree? Let me know!
Hope the rest of your week is fantabulous!
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
Sunday, August 13, 2006
Weekend Update
Last week in Blogland proved to be quite interesting and thought-provoking. Boomama started it off with this discussion about the Sovereignty of God, which led to many more discussions and shared testimonies, lots of encouragement and prayers for those who are struggling, and most importantly, evidence of the very topic of discussion. The way I see it, it was no coincidence that some of those who visited her blog that day and participated in the discussion were brought together. Yes, I believe He orchestrated it so that those who are struggling would be ministered to by those who had endured similar trials.
I am currently working to formulate a coherent response to Lori's post at Rattling Around, and like her, I'm sure in my beliefs but unsure of my ability to explain them to someone else. I do love a challenge. I seem to have more questions than answers, but I trust God even when I don't fully understand His ways. I hope you'll weigh in with your thoughts.
I am currently working to formulate a coherent response to Lori's post at Rattling Around, and like her, I'm sure in my beliefs but unsure of my ability to explain them to someone else. I do love a challenge. I seem to have more questions than answers, but I trust God even when I don't fully understand His ways. I hope you'll weigh in with your thoughts.
Thursday, August 10, 2006
Back to School Blues
First things first: Please go here and pray for Kim's husband's safety. I'll wait until you get back.
This is the first year I haven't had to buy school supplies. I didn't get to take my girls shopping for school clothes, not that I miss shopping, it's just... different. I'm not fond of shopping, especially with my older daughter, who is so picky - MY WORD, that child is impossible to please. OK, truth is it isn't the shopping I mind, it's the spending. I could window shop all day, not spend a dime, and come home, happy as a clam, empty-handed. If a clam had hands, that is, which they don't, but you get the picture.
Anyway. My office building is located right next door to one of our two high schools. It isn't the school my girls would attend if they were here, but it's school all the same, complete with buses loaded with kids and parents in SUVs dropping off and picking up their offspring. My office window affords me a view of the school's driveway, so at about 3:30 each afternoon I get to watch the cars line up as parents wait to retrieve their children from the clutches of public education. This was my cue last year to give Lindsey a call to make sure she was on the bus and on her way home. That isn't the case this year. Sounds depressing, don't it? Yeah, well, that's not my thing, although I could stand to lose my appetite and drop a few pounds. I appreciate the irony of it is all I'm saying.
School for them doesn't even start for another week and a half. I've often wondered if we should have homeschooled. I did consider it prayerfully before Lindsey ever started school. Back then, she was the sweetest thing. I couldn't bear the thought of sticking my precious baby on a bus with all those older kids. All the schools there are on one big campus, and each bus runs one route to pick up all the kids from Kindergarten through 12th grade. Her older sister, Robin, was in high school at the time, and I knew that Lindsey would be trying to tag along with her and her friends. Terrifying thought, actually. I began to pray about it well before she turned 5, but her dad was against it. It wasn't a popular choice among parents in the community. Most of them were teachers, and many of them were members of our church. Kids need socialization, don't they?
Miraculously (?) as soon as she turned 5, all the sweetness and light evaporated, and I couldn't wait for the bus to run so I could shove her sassy little self out the door and lock it securely behind her. I didn't, of course. She turned 5 in February and wouldn't be eligible for kindergarten until August. So, you know, I had to wait.
Oh, she was so excited. She already knew how to read and tie her shoes and a bunch of other stuff that parents leave up to the public schools to teach. Can you believe some parents don't teach their children to read? Kindergarten started one week later than the other grades, and Sarah and I accompanied our school girl to her class. To get pictures of her first day of school, not because she wanted us there. We had gone the week before to find her classroom, meet her teacher, and choose a desk. I was so proud of her when she led the way down the hall straight to her class a whole week after having been shown the way only once. That's my girl!
Sarah and I hung around just long enough to let the teacher know that we were available for field trips and whatever else she might need us to help with. Then we were free to go do our own thing. That was a pretty good year.
This is the first year I haven't had to buy school supplies. I didn't get to take my girls shopping for school clothes, not that I miss shopping, it's just... different. I'm not fond of shopping, especially with my older daughter, who is so picky - MY WORD, that child is impossible to please. OK, truth is it isn't the shopping I mind, it's the spending. I could window shop all day, not spend a dime, and come home, happy as a clam, empty-handed. If a clam had hands, that is, which they don't, but you get the picture.
Anyway. My office building is located right next door to one of our two high schools. It isn't the school my girls would attend if they were here, but it's school all the same, complete with buses loaded with kids and parents in SUVs dropping off and picking up their offspring. My office window affords me a view of the school's driveway, so at about 3:30 each afternoon I get to watch the cars line up as parents wait to retrieve their children from the clutches of public education. This was my cue last year to give Lindsey a call to make sure she was on the bus and on her way home. That isn't the case this year. Sounds depressing, don't it? Yeah, well, that's not my thing, although I could stand to lose my appetite and drop a few pounds. I appreciate the irony of it is all I'm saying.
School for them doesn't even start for another week and a half. I've often wondered if we should have homeschooled. I did consider it prayerfully before Lindsey ever started school. Back then, she was the sweetest thing. I couldn't bear the thought of sticking my precious baby on a bus with all those older kids. All the schools there are on one big campus, and each bus runs one route to pick up all the kids from Kindergarten through 12th grade. Her older sister, Robin, was in high school at the time, and I knew that Lindsey would be trying to tag along with her and her friends. Terrifying thought, actually. I began to pray about it well before she turned 5, but her dad was against it. It wasn't a popular choice among parents in the community. Most of them were teachers, and many of them were members of our church. Kids need socialization, don't they?
Miraculously (?) as soon as she turned 5, all the sweetness and light evaporated, and I couldn't wait for the bus to run so I could shove her sassy little self out the door and lock it securely behind her. I didn't, of course. She turned 5 in February and wouldn't be eligible for kindergarten until August. So, you know, I had to wait.
Oh, she was so excited. She already knew how to read and tie her shoes and a bunch of other stuff that parents leave up to the public schools to teach. Can you believe some parents don't teach their children to read? Kindergarten started one week later than the other grades, and Sarah and I accompanied our school girl to her class. To get pictures of her first day of school, not because she wanted us there. We had gone the week before to find her classroom, meet her teacher, and choose a desk. I was so proud of her when she led the way down the hall straight to her class a whole week after having been shown the way only once. That's my girl!
Sarah and I hung around just long enough to let the teacher know that we were available for field trips and whatever else she might need us to help with. Then we were free to go do our own thing. That was a pretty good year.
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
My Fortress
A week and a half ago, I made the trip to Arkansas fully expecting my girls to come home with me. I have explained to them and their dad (and anyone else who'll listen) my reasons for believing that they need to be here with their mother. They don't necessarily disagree, it's just not what they want. Their dad disagrees that it's what they need because it's not what they want. I've been praying non-stop, and countless others have joined me in prayer over them, and I trust they (and you) will continue to do so. I know God is listening. He's working on it. On them. On me.
Making the trip home without them was next to unbearable. I was angry. I was heartbroken. The pain was overwhelming, and I was tempted to stifle my feelings, but I realized that was my old way of coping. I would retreat into "safe" mode, behind a wall of denial and a facade of happy-go-lucky. I had many people fooled, including myself, for many years. Pretending not to care can lead to actually not caring. I don't want that. God doesn't want that. As much as I would like to not feel the pain, I can't be that person anymore.
Bev's comments on Captivating - Chapter 8 reminded me again that I am not who I was then. This quote resonates with me: "But the experience of sorrow in no way diminishes the joy of living. Rather, it enhances it. A heart awakened to its sorrow is more aware, more present, and more alive, to all the facets of life." That is so true! Numbing my heart to pain robbed me of the ability to feel much of anything. My empathy turned to apathy. How pathetic is that?
I still have moments when I wish I could retreat into oblivion, but God has been at work tearing down that wall. What then shall I do? I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust. (Psalm 91:2)
Making the trip home without them was next to unbearable. I was angry. I was heartbroken. The pain was overwhelming, and I was tempted to stifle my feelings, but I realized that was my old way of coping. I would retreat into "safe" mode, behind a wall of denial and a facade of happy-go-lucky. I had many people fooled, including myself, for many years. Pretending not to care can lead to actually not caring. I don't want that. God doesn't want that. As much as I would like to not feel the pain, I can't be that person anymore.
Bev's comments on Captivating - Chapter 8 reminded me again that I am not who I was then. This quote resonates with me: "But the experience of sorrow in no way diminishes the joy of living. Rather, it enhances it. A heart awakened to its sorrow is more aware, more present, and more alive, to all the facets of life." That is so true! Numbing my heart to pain robbed me of the ability to feel much of anything. My empathy turned to apathy. How pathetic is that?
I still have moments when I wish I could retreat into oblivion, but God has been at work tearing down that wall. What then shall I do? I will say of the LORD, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust. (Psalm 91:2)
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
Hot and Bloggered
I love summer. I thrive in warm temperatures. I'm cold natured, which means if the air conditioning is working like it should, it chills me to the bone. My office building is so cold that I look forward to getting into my car at lunchtime just to thaw out. I keep a sweater in my office so I won't freeze to death.
I'm the last person you'll hear complain about the heat. You know if I'm hot, then everyone else must be miserable, and I'm telling you it's hot. Sweat-on-your-upper-lip hot. You had that figured out already, didn't you? Yeah, it takes me a while.
So I'm sitting here trying to muster up the energy to do something. Even blogging seems like a chore. I have yet to complete the Bloggy Homes Tour, and I'm behind on my regular reading and commenting. As usual, there are about a million topics zinging around in my head, but none that I'm ready to commit to a post. There are several really good discussions going on other blogs that I'm trying to keep up with, and hoping to explore a few of those further on my own blog.
I'm wondering what's up with bloglines. For some reason, I'm not getting notified of all the new posts, so if you're missing my wit and wisdom (yeah, right) in your comments, don't worry. I haven't been abducted. I'm here, just moving along at a snail's pace so as not to work up a sweat.
Did I mention that it's hot?
I'm the last person you'll hear complain about the heat. You know if I'm hot, then everyone else must be miserable, and I'm telling you it's hot. Sweat-on-your-upper-lip hot. You had that figured out already, didn't you? Yeah, it takes me a while.
So I'm sitting here trying to muster up the energy to do something. Even blogging seems like a chore. I have yet to complete the Bloggy Homes Tour, and I'm behind on my regular reading and commenting. As usual, there are about a million topics zinging around in my head, but none that I'm ready to commit to a post. There are several really good discussions going on other blogs that I'm trying to keep up with, and hoping to explore a few of those further on my own blog.
I'm wondering what's up with bloglines. For some reason, I'm not getting notified of all the new posts, so if you're missing my wit and wisdom (yeah, right) in your comments, don't worry. I haven't been abducted. I'm here, just moving along at a snail's pace so as not to work up a sweat.
Did I mention that it's hot?
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